Purim Parody: Israel’s so corrupt, its dream of being part of region is fulfilled

“My ancestors always told me that part of the Jewish tradition is being a light unto the nations. Now with these impressive corruption levels, we have something to aspire to.”

A MAP of the Kingdom of Israel. (photo credit: Wikimedia Commons)
A MAP of the Kingdom of Israel.
(photo credit: Wikimedia Commons)
Israel is so corrupt that it finally matches the region, a great achievement according to experts. Professor Zev Porat at the Hebraic University says that for almost 70 years Israel has struggled to be part of the region but has been rejected by neighboring countries. However, recent scandals involving politicians taking gifts and other revelations of political leaders conspiring with major media to get better coverage ring true in Baghdad, Banghazi and other cities that barely function in the region.
“Zionism was seen as a colonizing European force by many of the Arab leaders in the region,” says the professor. However the latest findings of the Council of Economic Cooperation and Development (CECD) now indicate that Israel’s corruption levels have reached regional standards. “Now the Knesset and prime minister are seen as similar to any leader in the region and they accept Israel as having integrated.”
Praise has been pouring on from other countries after the findings were announced. Lebanese Prime Minister Walid Berri sent a note via US diplomats.
“We’re very pleased to welcome you to the club of dysfunctional countries in the region that are plagued by corruption and look forward to working together.”
The note included several cash-filled envelopes. A Yemenite sheikh also congratulated Jerusalem on its trailblazing levels of nepotism.
“My ancestors always told me that part of the Jewish tradition is being a light unto the nations. Now with these impressive corruption levels, we have something to aspire to.”