While visiting my neighbors, it occurred to me that I’ve been calling on single people mostly and it would be time to see a couple. The couple I thought of are two lovely people, both in their late eighties, the model for a lasting and very good marriage. I was lucky to find their door ajar, but I wondered at the deep silence within. I found them both, the husband and wife, sitting on a long couch, he on one end, she as far as possible on the other..
“We don’t talk to each other!” they informed me in unison.
“What happened? Why?”
“We just mentioned in passing our upcoming elections although still far off, and I said casually that I want Kadima forever. It seems that this small remark caused a tsunami with my wife. She started to shout like a banshee. ,Seems that she has loved and still loves Bibi, while I am a Kadima man!
The lady of the house looked furious.
“Naturally he prefers kadima, she intervenes at full volume, I always suspected that I’ve married a womanizer, but he kept this secret very well! , But when it comes to politics, all becomes clear! He prefers a woman just because she’s a woman and no matter whether she is good for the people or she isn’t! Tzipi wears a skirt, that’s it!”
She doesn’t wear a skirt, she wears pants!” he makes a point triumphantly.
“Bibi is good, says the lady, history will prove it! And anyway, can you show me anyone better? We just don’t have much choice!”
“Bibi!!!, her husband shouts, that liar, that pretender, that clown! My wife is crazy. He’ll bury us!’
“She finally turns to her husband and says:
“Remember the new libel amendment law! I can get you into jail!”
“OK, get me into jail and you’ll make your own coffee in the morning!”
All the time they’ve been talking to me and not to each other. Maybe this is the moment to leave but maybe if I do they’ll start to fight again. Can I afford to leave now?
“You know, addresses me the husband, that crazy wife of mine even voted for Obama!
And then I am the sex maniac! Until to-day she is impressed by his beautiful dark skin, his smooth voice, his athletic body!”
“Idiot, says the lady, how could I vote for Obama? I am not American!”
”Yes, but if you could, you would!”
“Look, I interfered, you can’t do this to me! I always cite you as the exemplary couple, a beautiful woman, and a very smart man! All the people in the Towers think so! Now you are going to spoil it all because of an election which isn’t going to happen for a long time?”
The man looks at his wife and says wistfully:
“She is beautiful, isn’t she? Look at her lovely white silvery curls! Look at her round, rosy cheeks! You should have seen her at our wedding! She shone like a star. Every man in that place envied me!”
“Come on, you exaggerate, says his wife with a sweet smile, every woman envied me because I got the smartest guy, an auditor with a splendid future, the one who bought me the most sparkling diamond ring!”
“None of your girl friends got such a ring, right?”
“You want to see our albums?” The husband gets up and approaches a cupboard.
I didn’t exactly want to look at albums. but at least I no longer felt that I am walking through a mine field.
Come to think of it, I myself never argued with my husband about politics; as a very obedient wife I let him decide what’s what. And our arguments were of a quite different kind.
Maybe I’ll go home and look at my own albums!
Lucca