Ivanka Trump, Real Rabbis, and True Love

By YEHOSHUA BEN-ELIYAHU
Each week, Rav Shlomo Aviner, head of Ateret Yerushalyim Yeshiva in the Old City and Rav of Beit-El,  answers hundreds of questions he receives in text messages.
He also publishes dialogues, which are answers he provides to a student's questions, on issues of the day.
This week, he dialogued about Ivanka Trump.
He was asked if her conversion was kosher and Rav Aviner answered that conversions of Rabbi Lookstein,  the rabbi involved, are accepted by both of Israel's chief rabbis.
And then Rav Aviner gave Rabbi Lookstein the ultimate seal of approval, "He is also humble, modest, and flees from honor,  a man of integrity, with proper character traits and a heart of gold."  --  which explains why he is sought out by people wanting to convert. Converts, no doubt, are looking for an honest, caring, sincere and self-effacing guide.  And, for that matter, aren't we all?
Aside from Rav Aviner's beautiful description of Rabbi Lookstein, his answer to a question about Ivanka Trump's demeanor struck me with atomic force.  "It doesn't seem like she wears a wig," the student says, and then asks, "Does she wear a wig?" to which the Rav answers, "I don't know.  It is forbidden to stare at a woman."
Encapsulated in this answer is the restraint, absence of nosiness, and tolerance, too, I think,  that characterize an authentically spiritual approach to others.  It is the same restraint and respect that you find in Israelis all the time.  Israelis may want to know the smallest details of each other's lives, but there is an incapacity for wanting to get under someone else's skin and a deeply held acceptance and tolerance of the other's inner self that is all-embracing, a symptom of the true love that underlies everything all human relationships in the Holy Land.
The reason you don't stare at a woman or, really, at anyone else, is that you do not want to allow external appearances of other people to govern your impressions of them.  Of course, looking too closely at a woman could elicit improper thoughts, but any stare is simply an invasion of privacy.  There is also the inference that, in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't really matter if Ivanka Trump wears a wig or not. Even Rav Soloveitchik's wife is said not to have worn a wig, despite her husband's stature as the pre-eminent  Torah scholar of his day.
Finally, there is a subtle hint here that the person who stares at a woman to notice if she is wearing a wig has a bigger problem than the woman being ogled, whether she is wearing a wig or not!