I recently purchased a coffee mug with the phrase “I want to decide who lives and who dies.”  If I were a certain American presidential candidate, it would probably cause at least a week’s worth of hand-wringing self-righteous condemnations from certain media and political gurus. 

The phrase is spoken by a certain robot character from the soon to be revived television series Mystery Science Theater 3000, the conceit of which was that the producers of the show took “cheesy movies, the worst that we can find” and overlaid them with the silhouettes of one human and two robots, trapped on a spaceship who were being tortured with said movies by mad scientists on the ground.  The human and two robots would make snide comments, a running commentary, on the movie which a lot of fans (myself included) found very funny.  The series ran for a number of years, first on Comedy Central, and then on the Sci-Fi Channel before being cancelled.  It has been revived recently, thanks to a Kickstarter campaign, and will be appearing once again very soon (I can hardly wait) on Netflix as a new series, with new writers and characters.

The phrase on the coffee mug I purchased was spoken by one of the two robots (specifically Crow T. Robot) whose visage appears on the mug.

One of the current American candidates for president is in the habit of making snide, sarcastic comments and jokes, which some news commentators and pundits and political sorts are in the habit now of reacting to with apoplectic condemnation and fainting spells, with accusations that said candidate wishes to throw babies out of his presence, shoot the opposing candidate, and get the Russians to hack his opponent’s emails.

I look at these reactions with a rolling of my eyes and a head shake.

While it is clear to normal human beings that said sarcastic candidate is, in fact, joking and being snide, said pundits don’t seem to be normal human beings at all.  I can only come up with two explanations for why certain people react to the sarcastic candidate as they do. Either they are blithering idiots with the IQ of a box of rocks, or they are vile and malicious and following in the footsteps of Richelieu who is quoted as saying something along the lines that if he had “two lines from the most honest of men, I’ll find something in them to hang him with.”

Given that the fainting snowflakes who condemn the sarcasm and take it as if it were intended seriously seem capable of stringing sentences together that sort of make sense, I’m leaning toward thinking that they are simply evil and wicked.

But maybe I’m wrong.  Maybe they’re just stupid.

Of course, I don't really like either of the major party candidates, but I despise obvious mendacity.


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