If I were a participant in the Visit Palestine flyin this past week I would be
laughing hysterically.
Look at those Israelis, they sent 650 police and
security folks to Ben-Gurion airport for a whole day. They conducted
intelligence operations for weeks to identify the names of all of those planning
to come. They spent hundreds of man- and woman-hours going through the Facebook
and twitter accounts of hundreds of people. Pretty humorous, I think.
All
to prevent a group of idealistic, pro-Palestinian activists from entering the
“only democracy in the Middle East.” What a huge success.
Public Security
Minister Yitzhak Aharonovitch can certainly put a feather in his cap – what a
brilliant operation. The Shin Bet (Israel Security Agency) outdid itself this
time. The Interior Ministry deserves to win the annual King David award for
Zionist heroism.
But I know what a good job our security people did. They
are my heroes this week. Thank God they kept those Palestinian lovers out of
Israel. God only knows what damage they might have done. Can you imagine if they
managed to get to Bethlehem? Just think what a couple of hundred Palestine
lovers holding Palestinian flags on the other side of the eight-meter high wall
could have done. Maybe they would have burned some Israeli flags. Maybe they
would have shouted “Free, free Palestine.” Oh my God.
Thank you God, once
again – just a few days ago we said our prayer “pour out Thy wrath on the
heathens... pour out thy indignation upon them... Pursue them in wrath and
destroy them....” We must have really been inspired with extra zeal this holiday
of liberation and freedom of ours. We really needed that inspiration so that we
could show the world once again just how wonderful we are and how strong and
determined a nation we are. No one can push us around.
WHAT OTHER country
in the world hands its visitors a letter on arrival telling them they should
visit our neighbors and help them over there to fight against injustice. That is
so benevolent of us. God, what a great country! I was so happy to see how we
convinced some of the biggest airline companies in the world, Lufthansa, Air
France and others not to let these Israel haters even board the planes. Ich
danke Ihnen sehr – 12 points Deutschland, merci beaucoup France – douze points!
Isn’t it great, all of these wonderful friends we have? I even saw on television
the Turkish police preventing protesters against Israel from entering the
planes. I guess the Turks really know how we welcome their people when they come
here – doesn’t matter if by plane or by ship. We know how to treat those Turks.
They are all religious fanatic Muslims anyway, just like their prime minister –
what’s his name? Erdo something.
Some of those idiot Israeli leftist
peaceniks even suggested that we let them come. Welcome them with flowers, they
said. Can you imagine that – hundreds of people carrying Palestinian flags and
shouting Free Free Palestine being handed roses by Israeli citizens – maybe even
some of our good-looking young people? We really would have looked ridiculous
when all of the international media, who hate us anyway, filmed that scene. The
world might think we are getting soft. Maybe someone somewhere might even get
the idea that our prime minister is serious when he talks about peace with our
neighbors.
What peace? Don’t be silly. Everyone knows our plan is to
continue to do what we are doing so well.
Once we lived in a time when
there wasn’t 24-hour media, or Facebook and twitter. We didn’t have to tell
white lies about our desire to make peace and to divide the land into two
states.
Those were the days. I remember when Yitzhak Shamir was prime
minister. That was a man with guts. He told it straight. He said the sea is the
same sea and the Arabs are the same Arabs.
Wow, he was great.
When
the first president Bush twisted his arm and made him show up in Madrid, he was
no pushover. Shamir said without hesitation – we will negotiate with the Arabs
for 20 years and move half a million Israelis into Judea and Samaria. He was
right, and we did what he said.
He said we will not negotiate with the
PLO – not because they are terrorists, but because negotiating with them means
only one thing – giving them a state, and we will never do that. Boy, do I miss
the good old days.
I saw that video today on television where that brave
army commander in the Jordan Valley let that rude European bicycle rider have it
in the face with his M16. He didn’t shoot him – no we don’t do those kinds of
things. Who do you think we are? We don’t use live ammunition against
protesters. We are democratic. More subtle, more caring. That brave officer used
his gun as a baton. Right in the face. Wow, you don’t see that every day. We
were so lucky that someone was there with a camera to share it with us. I am
sure it will be a big hit on YouTube.
We need more brave people like that
in army.
The next time those Arab-loving Europeans come to ride their
bikes on our street, they will think twice. He’ll probably have a scar on his
face for the rest of his life. He deserved it. Where does he think he is,
anyway, Amsterdam? Doesn’t he know it’s dangerous to ride through the Arab
areas, that something bad might happen to him? Doesn’t he know Palestinians are
all terrorists? We are only protecting them from the dangers of riding where the
Arabs live. Why do you think it’s illegal for Israelis to go there? Israelis are
smart enough to know the danger.
We have to protect tourists from the
dangers that they are too naive to know about.
If they’re looking for
action and want to be brave, let them go to Syria. Now there’s a leader who
knows how to send the message home. I wonder if Assad might consider converting
to Judaism? He could make aliyah. We could sure use his type here.
The
writer is the co-chairman of IPCRI, the Israel Palestine Center for Research and
Information, a columnist for The Jerusalem Post, a radio host on All for Peace
Radio and the initiator and negotiator of the secret back channel for the
release of Gilad Schalit.
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