I'm a musician, or more specifically, a frustrated one.

By JAYA FORMA
I'm a musician, or more specifically, a frustrated one.
I love music with all my heart. From the way I express my passion for music you would think that I'm a musician and a half, but the truth couldn’t be further from that.
You see, all I have of music are vain illusions. I don’t dominate any instrument properly. I know some general terms of musical theory, and the rest just rings a bell in my subconscious. And to top it all, I cannot sing.
What is then, my music all about?
Music elevates me, it calms me down, it cheers me up, it relaxes, and touches me. It lifts me up with its scales and it changes me. It transports me to the past and it inspires my future. It distracts me, but it also helps me concentrate. It makes me reflect, it reminds me of the voices inside of us that connect us, and it gives us strength when those voices become one. It expresses us, and it lets us transmit that which words sometimes simply cannot say.
But aside from how music affects us, what is music in its essence?
"Music is nothing but patterns," says M. Bassara in one of her novels—If you learn the patterns, you can play anything. Everything in creation is patterns. DNA, water molecules, the Eiffel tower, geological formations, seashells. And all of it is music. Everything. Even electrons and quarks are in constant motion, generating song on a frequency we don't hear, but a universal song just the same.
Waves, sound waves, light waves: just different frequencies of patterns. The entire universe is a logical structure of patterns. Patterns by definition are not random. And for such a large amount of patterns to coordinate under a yet bigger pattern, there must be a conductor and He has to be running the show.
The patterns that make up a seashell, the interlocking molecules, the patterned ridges and the scalloped edge, all coordinate. Then the seashell and its erstwhile inhabitant coordinate in the myriads of interdependent patterns that make up the ocean, from its ecosystem to the pattern of currents.
In a pattern, every piece is vital. Without it, the pattern is broken. So we're not trivial specks of cosmic dust, every one of us is crucially important to the universe.
No snowflake is the same; no two people are the same. Each is unique in creation. Definitely not insignificant. And not random. In a world of intricately interlocking patterns, there's no room for random. That means we're exactly where we're supposed to be at any given time, and the things that happen around us are exactly what are supposed to be happening to us for us to accomplish our function in creation.
"The challenge as human beings with free will is finding how to stay in harmony with the cosmic song, because only by acting according to the general pattern we won’t be generating cosmic dissonance." — Sun inside Rain.
Everyone has in their power the capacity to read that sheet music and perform it with their unique instrument, contributing to the beautiful symphony of musicians across the globe with the sound that only they can create.
On second thought, I am a musician. The same way you and the fellow next to you are. We're all musicians of our lives. And we all have the honor of performing under the greatest conductor of all. Let’s not disappoint Him. Let’s not be frustrated musicians.


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