Manchester synagogue attacker Jihad al-Shamie was "vile" in his marriage, his second wife told the Manchester Evening News earlier in October as she detailed the abuse, rape, and manipulation she claimed to experience during their relationship.
Shamie, who rammed his vehicle into a synagogue on Yom Kippur before stabbing its Jewish congregants, lied to his second wife about being unmarried, the unnamed woman claimed. Once she learned the truth, the young woman described how the relationship quickly became abusive.
"He was nice, then he was vile. Nice. Vile," she said. "It was his way or no way. He said that before we had a relationship, we needed to be married."
The woman, who converted to Islam in 2012, recounted how she met al-Shamie on the Muslim dating app Muzz in December 2021 and married a month later in a Nikah ceremony over Zoom due to COVID-19 restrictions. The 10-minute ceremony made her the second wife, and al-Shamie would go on to marry a third.
In text messages seen by the local newspaper, al-Shamie wrote: "Look I'm gonna be honest with you. I do have a wife and a baby son at home. I didn't tell u because I really liked you and wanted u to be my 2nd wife but I didn't know how u wud react."
"In Islam a man can have up to four wives but these days most women don't accept it, but I shouldn't have lied. It was wrong of me," he wrote in a later message.
The second wife explained that al-Shamie quickly became controlling and said he raped her several times. While she did not go to the police, al-Shamie was out on bail at the time of his arrest after being accused of rape by another woman. Al-Shamie also reportedly had an abusive extramarital relationship with an 18-year-old sixth-form student after lying about being 24, the Telegraph reported. He reportedly confessed to having “rape fantasies” and forced her to watch “extreme” videos made by ISIS.
"Good luck getting any guy to deal with your rubbish," he wrote to the second wife. "Your not worth it and I can do better - don't need someone with your baggage and mental issues."
In contrast to his earlier messages, al-Shamie later wrote promising to buy her an iPad, a washing machine and purchase a home nearby.
"I thought I loved him at the beginning, because he showed me something that I wanted. He was caring and understanding and didn't judge my kids for their needs,” she explained to newspaper. "He would smooth talk with a bit of anger if you crossed the line with him. He would say 'I love you, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that'. He was controlling and abusive. He did rape me multiple times, but to us we just fulfil what our husband's say.
"He was one of them where you have got to do it there and then."
"Every time I met him he was pushy - his way or no way. We had to obey by our husbands. What our husbands say, we do. If he's got needs, we have to fulfil them. It's our duty to. We just kept talking. I was trying to distance myself but he would always say he loved me and that I meant the world to him. He would say 'I want this to work,’” she continued.
The Manchester synagogue attack
After learning of the Manchester attack, the woman said she reflected on their relationship together and the ideologies he had aligned himself with.
"His face was there," she said. "My first thought was just 'why'. He would never preach anything. The only thing he would do was pray. He never showed me, or said anything about, terrorism, or joining anything. It was all about the mosque and praying."
"He used to pray in my home," she said. "But he knows how to manipulate you and make you think you're the bad guy. He would twist things."
“I wouldn’t say he’s got the mindset of being a terrorist from what I know of him – but at the same time how aggressive he was, how manipulating he was,” she told the Guardian.