I am taking any sides here between the distinguished rabbis that so strongly disagree on the matter. The issue here is whether there is ever a time where a husband can withhold a Get from his wife.
It has been argued that in our day, a man too has limitations. He too cannot marry another woman if he does not give his wife a Get or she does not accept it. While this is true, it is not an impenetrable barrier. The nature of the prohibition for man to remarry has loopholes. Loopholes based on the fact that on a biblical level a man may marry more than one wife. A woman on the other hand may not have more than one husband. There prohibition today against a man having more than one wife was established by a medieval commentator, Rabbenu Gershom.
But that is not even a rabbinic level prohibition. It is just a Cherem. Which essentially means that anyone violating it would be ostracized from the Jewish community. Sephardim do not have this prohibition at all. (Although I don’t know too many Sephardi bigamists even in countries where that is legal. But I digress.)So that if a wife does not accept the Get, the husband can technically marry without it. And any children of that union will be full fledged Jews without any taint. What about the Cherem? Is that not a deterrent? To some extent it is. But there is something called a Heter Meah Rabbonim. Which means that if a husband gives his wife a get and she refuses it, he can petition 100 rabbis to sign a document that allows him to have 2 wives. But even without that if he violates the Cherem, his children will still be full fledged Jews without any taint.
This is the deal breaker for me. It is absolutely clear that Halacha makes this an un-level playing field. And as such should never be used by a man as leverage under any circumstances.
Rabbis are not totally insensitive to this inherent unfairness. The RCA has for example devised a prenuptial agreement that- should the marriage break down - requires a heavy financial burden of support (called Mezonos in the Kesubah, the Jewish Marriage contract) paid to the wife if he denies her a Get. There are other things rabbis can do via a Beis Din. Like putting all kinds of social pressures on the recalcitrant husband - making him a pariah in his community. Or like in Israel where a man can be jailed indefinitely for refusing to give his wife a get.
In some cases extreme methods are used that go way too far. So much so that many have crossed lines in a variety of ways misapplying Halacha or using tortured interpretations of circumstances to use the rare loopholes that allow an Agunah to remarry. In some cases methods used are both unethical and illegal. Those who have tried are paying a very high price for it now. Nevertheless, what all that shows is that there are rabbis who do care and are trying - one way or another - to remedy the situation.
I should add that there are unfortunately many rabbinic courts set up for this purpose are corrupt. If I had it in my power I would throw the so called Dayanim (judges) running those courts in jail. But that is beside the point of this post.
Bottom line - the system is fundamentally unfair. And the playing field must be made level by assuring that the Get is given immediately. What about egregiously unfair allegations – like sex abuse made by some wives against their husbands in custody battles? …allegations that are untrue? That is an outrage and should be fought with everything one has. But not with the use of a weapon unavailable to his wife. Retain the best lawyer you can and fight for your rights that way. Not with a loaded gun in your hand pointed at your wife.