ByHA HA HA-LEVY

 An Israeli bio-innovative company called Sweet Jews unveiled a world’s-first technology this week just in time for Purim that may very well prove to be a solution to world hunger – the first lab-made regenerating giant hamantashen.

The solution weaves together nanotech with the Jewish tradition of offering mishloach manot (portions being delivered) to the poor for Purim. A dough mixture (the user can variate the filling between chocolate, halva or even poppy, if they really, really insist) is pre-loaded in the Sweet Jews lab. Then, a unique generator is gently placed inside each raw hamantashen before it is baked that sends out tentacles in each direction of the pastry and is equipped with tiny voice activated sensors, like Alexa.

Once people have had their fill of the sofa-cushion-sized delicacies, all that is needed is to pour a cup of tap water into the generator at the center of the pastry. Nano-bots transform the water molecules during the night into fresh dough which is secreted via the tentacles to “fill up” the missing chunks.

In its first trial, 10 pastries were given to families in need across the country and the health (and weight) of the family members is being monitored for one week, as well as the growth-rate of the pastry.

“We all know that yeast is a living thing,” Sweet Jews founder Rabbi Kfitzat Haderech told The Jerusalem Roast. “If you keep feeding it with water and sugar, it can live forever. Why burn the life potential of pastry by baking it?”

If successful, Sweet Jews plans to release other products along the same line, such as Forever Matza and Big-as-a-House Sufganiyot.