Zuckerberg and Hamas: A Facebook romance

By DONI KANDEL
In what has become a far too common occurrence, Facebook’s very own CEO, Mark Zuckerberg, is guilty of carrying out an extremely public, and utterly nauseating, romance with the Palestinian terrorist group Hamas, on the popular social networking site. Zuckerberg’s newest encounter with cupid explains Facebook’s refusal, for more than a week, to take down a group on its site titled “Third Palestinian Intifada” despite a direct request from the state of Israel to remove the page, which calls for the killing of innocent civilians in Israel.
The new love birds were outed when Hamas changed its Facebook relationship status from the always hilarious “it’s complicated” with Bibi Netanyahu to “in a relationship” with Mark Zuckerberg. They have since exhibited all the signs of the classic couple whose never-ending correspondence dominates your News Feed. An old High School classmate of Zuckerberg’s reportedly unfriended him after Mark posted “Fatwah. LMFAO!” on Hamas’s wall, a typical case of posting obviously personal jokes on each other’s walls to the aggravation and exasperation of virtually everyone else.
Although Zuckerberg originally had reservations about giving his heart to Hamas, all of his doubts abated thanks to the help of the European Union. “We are so thankful to [EU High Representative of the Union for Foreign Affairs and Security Policy] Catherine [Ashton],” Zuckerberg told reporters Sunday, “when she tagged [Hamas Chairman] Khaled [Mashal] in that picture of Mother Theresa I just knew I had made the right choice.” Ashton reportedly posted on Hamas’s wall “just another day in the life of being your wingman! Happy to help!” later in the day.
After the Anti-Defamation League posted a challenge to justify the Intifada page in light of the brutal slaying of a family in Itamar a few weeks ago, as well as the fatal terrorist bombing of a bus stop in front of the Jerusalem Central Bus Station on Wednesday, on Zuckerberg’s wall, he succinctly responded “I see no connection”. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad reportedly “likes” this.
The Western World, who has the most friends in Facebook history, has yet to publicly, privately, or even in a Tweet, condemn the hate-spewing page. Zuckerberg took this as yet another affirmation of his (non)actions. “If the Western World hasn’t said anything, how bad could it really be? When was the last time the Western World was silent when Jews were in trouble?”
[While Facebook has finally announced it has taken the page down, dozens of new pages are still popping up. If you have Facebook please click here to learn how to report these pages and eradicate this blatent anti-Semitism and call for bloodshed from Facebook. ]