Bologna, Italy - A panel of Israeli sex and trauma therapists discussed the traumatic consequences of war, focusing on the profound impact of sexual violence on individuals, couples, families, and communities at the Congress of the European Federation of Sexology that was held in Bologna, Italy, on Friday.
The session was presented to a capacity audience of doctors, therapists, and researchers from Europe, and cast light on the experiences of Israeli survivors and the challenges faced by sex and couples therapists working with trauma and sexual violence in the context of war. The session was chaired by Dr. Mijal Luria, president of the Israel Society for Sex Therapy (ISST).
Talli Yehuda Rosenbaum, who is a certified sex therapist and supervisor for individual and couple therapy, opened the session by discussing how trauma affects intimacy and sexuality. She presented her team’s research findings regarding the acute effect of the Israel-Hamas war on sexual behaviors and highlighted the importance of trauma-informed sexual medicine and sex therapy interventions.
Rosenbaum said that sex therapists needed to have an understanding of how trauma affects sex, and pointed out that many people who did not directly experience violence have become traumatized by watching the numerous video clips of Hamas that have been shared on social media. “Exposure to the media of violence, and especially, sexual violence, is a way to get traumatized. You don’t have to have been there.”
Addressing the treatment of those who have suffered trauma, Rosenbaum added that sexual intimacy requires feelings of emotional and physical vulnerability, which can be difficult for people who have undergone trauma. Finally, she described how a healing journey that focuses on consent, autonomy, boundaries, safety, pleasure, and connectedness can be instrumental in healing sexual trauma.
ANDY IFERGANE, who heads the Social Work Services and the Sexual Therapy Clinic in the department of psychiatry at Soroka Medical Center, explored the impact of rape as a weapon of war on past survivors and the subsequent challenges in breaking the silence surrounding this topic.
Rape as a weapon of intimidation in war
She noted that rape has been used as a tool of power and intimidation in war for thousands of years. Ifergane cited the investigative article published by The New York Times, which confirmed that Hamas had carried out sexual assaults and mutilation of Israeli women and girls as part of a concerted weaponization of sexual violence.
Since the outbreak of the war on October 7 and the reports of the sexual violence committed by Hamas, there has been a significant increase in applications to rape crisis centers, mental health clinics, hospitals, and health funds.
“A large part of the applications to all rape crisis centers are from recurrent survivors who, after the publication about the severe sexual violence perpetrated by Hamas, experienced a flood of post-traumatic symptomatology, ” Ifergane explained.
She interviewed psychotherapists and sex therapists who reported numerous cases in which victims of past sexual abuse experienced nightmares. One woman who had been sexually abused by her uncle in the past reported having nightmares of Hamas soldiers entering her home with a rifle and raping her. Another, who had also been sexually abused by relatives, experienced a compulsion to view the Hamas videos of sexual violence. “Everyone says not to watch them,” Ifergane said, “but I can’t stop. It’s like an obsession. It’s like poking at an open wound.”
Further, Ifergane drew parallels between the feelings of children who have experienced sexual abuse within their family, whose testimony is frequently not believed, and the silence of international women’s organizations, who did not come to the defense of Israeli women who suffered rape and abuse.
“The dynamic within a family,” she noted, “is usually a triangle consisting of the daughter – the child who is being abused – the father, who is the abuser, and the mother, who is the supposed sole source of safety. She’s aware of the abuse, but she has chosen to remain silent.
“The impact of maternal silence has devastating consequences for survivors. The silence then becomes a form of abuse, invading the survivors’ experience and leaving them feeling isolated and unsafe. It can also lead to feelings of betrayal, anger, and confusion with the potential for increased depression, anxiety, difficulty with trust and intimacy, and problems in relationships,” Ifergane continued.
Israeli women felt similarly betrayed when international women’s organizations remained silent after reports of sexual violence against Israeli women surfaced, said Ifergane.
“I would argue that the silence of the women’s organizations affected women in general, particularly survivors of sexual abuse. This is an amplification of the pattern they recognized from their homes,” she said.
DR. TAL PELAG-SAGY, a clinical psychologist and a supervisor in sex therapy who lectures at Ben-Gurion University, works in a private clinic and also supervises at the Rotem Center in Jerusalem. She delivered the final presentation which explored the concepts of self-states in times of war and the idea of moral injury in this regard.
Peleg-Sagy recounted the events of October 7 to the mostly European audience, many of whom were not familiar with the details. She pointed out how the war has affected the country, adding that virtually everyone in Israel knows someone who was directly affected by the attacks.
“What was very crucial and important for us as therapists,” she explained, “was that this was an online attack. From the early hours of the morning, everything was being recorded. Hamas broadcasted everything that they did. There were victims crying for help; everything was on the media – on Facebook and Instagram. People were exposed, watched, and are still re-watching the direct visions and images of what has happened.”
After the presentations, members of the audience posed questions to the three presenters. One criticized the Israeli presenters for ignoring Palestinian suffering, and not presenting a more “inclusive” point of view.
Responding to this comment, Rosenbaum said, “On October 7, Hamas did not differentiate between Jews, Muslims, and Christians who were also taken into captivity and were murdered.”
Other audience members indicated their sympathy for the Palestinians, including one participant, sporting a keffiyeh around his neck, who accused the IDF of raping Palestinian women and questioned why the therapists presented the account from an Israeli perspective only. Many in the audience protested his claim.
Ifergane responded, noting that she and the other therapists were Israelis and could only present from that perspective, adding, “I’m an Israeli therapist and I’ve been working with Jews, Muslims, and Christians in Israel, because I live there.”
After the panel, Ifergane said, “I don’t think I have ever been so moved by a lecture at a conference. The hall was full, and they let us speak with European politeness.”
“But after the lectures, there were comments and questions to the panel itself. Some were sympathetic responses, but some of the statements and questions were not simple and even defiant. I think we answered professionally and respectfully.
“I have never felt so important. I feel it is a mission to tell what we Israelis and Israeli women have been going through since that terrible morning of October 7, 2023,” Ifergane concluded.